It is said that God is love 1John 4:16, with that being said this song that I have listened to countless times
Has a whole new meaning to me now. I often feel like I am, or have to hold everything around me together.
Like God has given me a task and then just left me unattended to figure it out on my own . And its not until
I fail that I'm reminded that i'm not the one who is holding anything together, and that I don't even have to
Be able to hold anything together. That I can let my world crash and love can take it. That he will be there
To pick up the pieces when I cant. This is something God has convicted me of this week, though he has
Made me strong, he wants me only to rely on his strength, and his alone. 2 Samuel 22:33
Love is all around you know, so take a hold hidden in our words it sometimes ain't enough don't suffocate day after day, its building up cause when you're feeling week, you know I'm strong enough just one more day, one more day oh let the world crash love can take it oh let the world come crashing down oh let the world crash love can take it love can take a little, love can give a little more love is indestructible, so take a hold sometimes hard to find a reason good enough ill stand beside you never leave, through it all and faith will bring a way to the impossible just one more day, one more day oh let the world crash love can take it oh let the world come crashing down oh let the world crash love can take it love can take a little, love can give a little more you can find me, you can find me you can find me anywhere take a look over you're shoulder ill be standing there love is all around you now so take a hold and faith will bring a way to the impossible just one more day, one more day (you can find me, you can find me, you can find me anywhere) just one more day, one more day
(you can find me, you can find me, you can find me anywhere)
oh let the world crash love can take it
oh let the world come crashing down
oh let the world crash love can take it
love can take a little, love can give a little more
a little more take a little more take a little more love can take it a little more
In a place where, if you are a Christian you are registered on a list by the government?
In a place where the times you can have church is controlled by the government, from how long worship time is, to how long the message can be?
In a place where the translator that you can hire, is an informant for the government?
In a place where if people protest the government, instead of being heard they get shot?
In a place where the government will come into local stores and close them down just because they can?
In a place where the government performs house checks for drugs or weapons, and rapes the women and children while their there?
In a place where if you don't do what the government says to do like "frame this person", or "kill these people". you get put into prison and tortured for however long they feel necessary?
In a place where there is no privacy because the government has hidden microphones everywhere?
In a place where entire races of people are being killed off?
In a place where the government spends less than $1 per YEAR per PERSON on education and healthcare?
In a place where the government starts conflicts between religious tribes to get them to kill each other off ?
I have been in Puerto Barrios for six days now. We are partnering with a local Christian radio station here called Shofar ministries, our contact Paul has shown us There are many ministry opportunities here that we could pour ourselves into. everything from ministering at bars to the men and women there, To doing construction with local churches , or spending time at a local orphanage, and even just going and playing basketball, or football (soccer) with the older kids down at the park close by.
We have had a chance this first week to do everything I listed above, but today they asked us to find a place we would like to really get involved with, where we could start to build lasting relationships with the people here. We are here with another team as well, team Rama and it was funny to me because as we were talking about where we felt God is leading us, our two teams split back to its original teams logos, and Rama . Which again just says to me that how the teams were chosen were not by chance, or random.
This is also where I find myself torn. You see my team has chosen to go back to the orphanage and just help clean it up, and love on the kids there. When we were there the last time I met a little boy named Allen. He is about eight or nine years old, and I could tell right from the time we got there he wasn't very happy, or excited about us. When all the other boys came out and we started playing football, he stayed back and just stared out the fence. We finally got him to come play, but it took some effort. Then as soon as the games were finished, and we were starting to say our goodbyes Allen disappeared. As we were driving back in the van, I was thinking, why would he just run off? Did we make him mad? But then I realized all he has ever known is goodbye, and he doesn't like it, I mean who would like always being left and forgotten? I would hate it too. So this is where I find myself torn, I find myself asking the question if I go back and pour my heart out into this boy will it help? Will it be enough to show him that I care, or will it only bring more pain, more feelings of rejection? Its at this time I start saying; my God is big! he is big enough to show his love through me in an even shorter amount of time than I have here. And if I don't believe that, then why am I here? Why have I left everything I know to come here.
So I have to believe Allen can be shown the glory and love of his creator in the short time I'm here. So I have to choose in!
so one of my friends here has been areally big help to me with preparing for what we are about to to, she found alot of really good info on the countries we know we will be visiting, and i just thought yall might like to read it.
So the past couple of months I have been having problems letting go. Letting go of things that I feel I have earned, I worked for, things I felt that I deserved! And the lord has really been pressing on my heart over these past few months just what it is he wants me to let go, things I REALLY did not want to let go of, first of which was tools. Now im sure that sounds crazy, but that's something a mechanic prides himself on is his set of tools. Well after about a week of trying to ignore God on the subject, I finally broke down and did one of those "ok God, what do Ya want me to do?" prayers, and im not going to lie, I didn't even spend a lot of time on that subject with him, but sure enough within a week, a friend at work asked if I wanted to sell him one of my tool boxes. Well as much as it hurt, I had to let it go.
The next thing that the Lord laid on my heart to give up just happened to be my truck! I was really not ok with this, I mean this was the truck I had since high school, I drove that truck half way across the country and back, I had a lot of seat time in it, and my bond with it was strong, it's a good truck! (I promise im not crazy, I just really like my truck). After about a month of praying about it, I decide I need to stop riding the fence, and give all of me to what it is God is going to do. Now I just had to figure out how to sell the vehicle I drive every day. Well God defiantly solved that problem for me! Last Friday I wake up early because I had a coupon for a free breakfast meal from sonic (Im always pumped about free food!)I get ready for work, walk outside and I find my truck isn't in the driveway, well im still pretty tired so im like "maybe I parked in front of the house" so I walk around, and its not there. I just start laughing, because once I realized my truck had been stolen, I knew my question on how to sell it had been answered! As funny as I thought all that was, nobody in my family thought it was as funny as I thought haha!
In everything that's been going on the past couple of months, I have realized that I can give up everything I have to gain everything he is, or hold on to the things I have acquired in this world and limit the power of the holy spirit to work in my life and through me!
His food came and after we gave it to